Change

Hello family and friends!! I know I have not updated my blog in FOREVER, but life has been pretty crazy. Just a quick update for those of you that don’t know what is going on. About two months ago Nick came to me and told me he wanted a divorce. I was in COMPLETE shock, I knew that our marriage was suffering but I had no idea Nick felt this way, (and I take full responsibility for my blindness). So to make a long story short I tired convincing him to stay for the last two months, Nick keep telling me that it is over and nothing is going to change that. So two months later I can’t keep convincing him to stay, so it is final. This whole thing breaks my heart for my kids they just don’t understand what is going on. As for me I want to let everyone that has been there for me know that they are the ones that give me strength, that without them I probably would have went CRAZY! So thank you to all the people I love, (you know who you are)! As for the future I am excited to get ME back. Through the years of being pregnant, a mom, a wife, and a maid I lost who I was. I can’t wait to get back into the things I truly enjoy and get my life back for my kids and for MYSELF. I have all ready started a great thing in losing the weight I want to lose, (34 pounds to date), and I can’t wait to keep losing the weight. One last thing if I happen to see you at church or out and about please don’t have pity for me that is the last thing I want is pity. Please just give me the strength you have and try to give me hope for the future. I have to ONLY focus on the positives this situation has presented to me, and those positives are how strong my relationship has grown to the LORD. I truly believe that the Lord wants what’s best for us and that he would not give us a trial that we could not over come. Not saying that this is what the Lord wanted for me, people have their free agency. But I know that if I turn to the Lord at this time he will give me all the strength I am going to need, and if I don’t feel like I have the strength to go on he will carry me until I do. I want to end this blog with my testimony and say I have never FELT so strong that this is truly our Heavenly Fathers TRUE church. That the only way you can ever know if what we believe as LDS members is true is to TRULY and SINCERELY seek the Lord. If you sincerely want a relationship with our Heavenly Father than all you have to do is open your heart and let him in. I know that prayer is not always easy and you may not always get the answers that you may want, but I know that he hears us. No matter who you are or what you have done he hears us each individually and he feels our pain and suffers with us. I know that through prayer we can develop a special relationship with our Heavenly Father that we can not achieve in any other way. I know that the scriptures, although confusing at times hold many answer that all of us seek in our life. And the only way to seek those answers is to study the scriptures, and I promise that if you do that your life will be blessed. I truly believe that the more trials the Lord throws our way the stronger person we become. And the most important thing that I testify to you today is that you can not do it by yourself. If you do not have the Lord in your life as your number one priority above EVERYONE else then you will NEVER be truly happy. Your marriage will never be the strongest it could be without the Lord there by your side. That your kids will never know true happiness until they, themselves know this truth. It has taken me a very long time to have the faith I need in the Lord to say I am weak and I can not do this without you. So if you have not come to that point in your life yet I challenge you to put everything else aside and turn to the Lord and let him in your heart because no matter how strong you think you are, you are NOT strong enough without the Lord. I leave this with you in the name of Jesus Christ.

Also my new blog is ficekfour@blogspot.com